Subject: FYI

From: [email-masked]
Date: Sat, 18 Dec 2004 13:43:00 EST

Just thought you needed to know this.
 
Dear Bob,

One of my students discovered the following on the Internet, and it made me  
think of you.  Perhaps you can share it with your current Stanford  
classmates.  I certainly wish I knew who wrote it.

- Tucker

Why God never received  tenure at any university:

1. He had only one major publication.

2.  It was in Hebrew.

3. It had no references.

4. It wasn't published  in a refereed journal.

5. Some even doubt he wrote it himself.

6.  It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since  
then?

7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.

8. The  scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.

9. He  never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human  
subjects.

10. When one experiment went awry he tried to cover it up by  drowning the 
subjects.

11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he  deleted them from the 
sample.

12. He rarely came to class, just told  students to read the Book.

13. Some say he had his son teach the  class.

14. He expelled his first two students for learning.

15.  Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his  
tests.

16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a  mountaintop